Great Outdoor Fight Museum

From The Great Outdoor Fight

The museum on the outskirts of the Acres houses a number of historical artifacts. These range from objects as large as the perpetually spinning Fight-Bot to the actual silverware used in the infamous Turkey Dinner Incident of 1970.

The museum employs a surprisingly large number of scientists and researchers. The famously cantankerous Young Jude Surrency once commented that, for the most part, these were "wet-behind-the-ears whippersnappers and damn sonuvabitch pencil pushers who never were in a real fight and wouldn't know one if'n they got their their noses bitten of off in one." On the other hand, the radio commentator Bob Raffles defended their work on his show: "Much as a diamond can only be created from coal subjected to incredible heat and pressure, it is only in the heat of battle and the pressure of this noble competition that we will find a true diamond of a champion. And if it were not for geologists and mineralogists, we would never have known that incredible heat and pressure are required to make diamonds. Truly these scholars and scribes play a vital role in our understanding of what makes the Great Outdoor Fight so very, very great."

In response, Surrency said "Bob, you are one dumb sonuvabitch."

Two former Champions of the fight, 1978's Wilton "the Professor" Rowley and 2003's Vance Eggbert, have gone on to become Curators of the Great Outdoor Fight Museum.